Wednesday, July 23, 2008

An Imaginary XLRI Interview

Disclaimer : All the characters in this interview are not at all fictitious and they are deliberately added to resemble the real ones. But again No offences meant :-)

Interview Panel : BFA Prof, CSE Prof, QT Prof, OB Prof, PR & OM Prof
Interviewee : Myself :-(

Interview Starts:

PR : ok my friend…tell me what is the bottleneck of you entering XLRI??

I : err…err.. Sir, you people over here.

(Laughs all over)

CSE : ok tell me what is carbon trading?

I: err..Sir is it selling carbon for money…

QT : Are you interrogating us??

I : Sorry Sir, I was answering actually.

CSE : I am not convinced.

BFA : yes yaar, you can help me over here. Will the money that came from carbon trading reflect in balance sheet..if yes, where??
[I cant help myself at this point, how can I help you :-( ]
I : ????..Sorry sir

QT : You have 3 blue-colored balls and 4 red-colored balls…

CSE : Sir, Please specify that eco-friendly colors have been used.

QT : Ok. You distribute them into 7 urns. What is the probability that at least one urn is empty.

I : Sir, To simplify things, I assume that one of the urns is closed with a lid. Now I can safely say that the probability is one.

PR : Ok my friend, You have ordered a dosa at some dosa center. What is it – A made to order, made to stock, assemble to order or an engineer to order.

(I thought, finally an easy one….My eyes glew and I started answering in great confidence)

I : Sir, As I am an engineer and I have ordered it…So it should be an engineer to order :-)

All Profs : ????

BFA : Ok. So once you pass out from XLRI and become a manager and then order a dosa…what will you call it…

Myself : err..Sir I guess there should be some more classifications in your question such as manager to order, doctor to order, B.SC to Order, BBS to order….

(Profs start laughing)

CSE : ok, Where is Tirupur located??

I : Sir, Its in Karnataka I guess…err tamilnadu…Kerala most probably…

QT : My friend, you are mentioning mutually exclusive and collectively exhaustive elements of the set.

[ I could not figure out whether finally my answer was taken or not but I played safe and kept quiet]

BFA : yes yaar, you can help me yaar… I have taken 20,33,262 from my friend at an interest rate of 10% p.a. I used it for starting a firm. I refunded 2,23,121 at regular intervals. Then after third year I gave 2000 debentures of Rs.2,100 each to my friend. Then I converted these debentures into shares and finally to preferential shares.
Now tell me yaar… what do you appreciate in this??

I: Sir, I appreciate your memory of recalling everything and your honesty of returning the loan.

CSE : Ok, tell me whats the average water consumption at your flat for a single day.

I : Sir, it depends on how many of my flat-mates take bath that day.

CSE : Ok. Lets assume all have taken bath.

I : Sir, then it depends on leisureness of the people as this determines how long they would like to take bath.

OB : hay-lo, hay-lo…What would you mean by a HALO effect.

I: It’s the effect of making people quiet when they go out of control by just saying HELLO two times.
(I was happy that I started my flow of correct answers)

QT : What is the probability of you getting into XLRI provided that I haven’t selected any student in my last 10 years of interviewing experience. Will you apply exclusive probability or conditional probability?

I : Applying conditional probability, Answer would be Close to zero.

QT : Finally You gave a correct answer my friend. You can leave now.

I: err…err..

BFA: Don’t worry…God is great and Life goes on…

(I leave sadly :-( )

16 comments:

ranjan said...

its sexy dude
amazing
best one ever
carry on the amazing wrk
in short tum phodu ho baap........

Harsh Realities.... said...

awesome read.....
fodu!!!!!!!

Mandar Kulkarni said...

man..this really is fundoo!!!

Aditya said...

Brillianttttttt!!!

Dikshit Sindhwani said...

awsome dude....bang on target!!!

Unknown said...

Now I know that my roomie doesnt waste time in the library :)

Unknown said...

absolutely awesome!!! :)

KauMoChan said...

mast!
looking for more such creative stuff in future..

naween said...

kitne aadmi the?
bahut saare, sarkaar!
aur tum?
sarkaar, main akela hi tha.
bahut nainsaafi hai.. bahut nainsaafi..

Unknown said...

hahaahhaa
mast hai yar. ;)
enjoyd evry bit o it.

sandeip said...

cool

Ankit_Karma said...

sahi hain guru
maan gaye tujhe :)

Chief Part Deux said...

Amen to the genuine ingenuity of the post...

Utpal Soni said...

great post dude....really enjoyed it

Keep it up..catch u sometime

Unknown said...

Awesome!!!..laughed my guts out reading it :)

Anonymous said...

great work!!!!